Ephesians 5:1-2, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”
The Bible is pretty clear in this verse and in many others that we are called to be like Christ. I mean that’s why we are called “Christians,” right? Christ-ian, meaning “like Christ.” I love Paul’s books because I feel like it gives practical ways on how to do that. But what happens when we fail? What happens when we try to pursue a life that is like Christ, but we don’t succeed?
Jesus was in perfect communication with the Father and always listened. He always knew what God wanted and He did it. I know for me, I try to do what God asks, but I don’t always perfectly know His will. Then, when I’m working toward something and it fails, I get disappointed. And especially when I’m trying to be like Christ in a big way, like when I want to serve my friends and family in a Christian way and it fails, I get more than disappointed, I get depressed.
I have been reading this book, “Victory Over The Darkness” by Neil T. Anderson and he talks about how to frame our mindset in these situations. We all want to be like Christ, but he differentiates a “godly goal” and a “godly desire.” A “godly goal” is “any specific orientation that reflects God’s purpose for your life and is not dependent on people or circumstances beyond your ability or right to control.” A “godly desire” is defined as “any specific result that depends on the cooperation of other people, the success of events or favorable circumstances you have no right or ability to control.” This means that when you are trying to be like Christ and things fail, that doesn’t mean that you are a bad Christian or even that you aren’t listening to God, it might just mean that the end goal wasn’t what YOU had in mind, but maybe it’s what God has in mind.
We can only control ourselves and then we can pray. So, if you are trying to patch up your relationship with your parents, focus on what you can do. Your “godly goal” would be to act in a loving and caring way and earnestly seek reconciliation regardless of the response. Your “godly desire” would be that you and your parents come to a complete understanding and the conflict resolves. Regardless of the outcome, you can still be like Christ in your pursuit and regardless of the outcome, you can find success in your ability to be like Christ in your pursuit. Remember that even when we are acting as Christ teaches, the outcome is up to Him, not you.
This week frame your interactions in this way. Focus on what you can do and leave the rest to God. Not being responsible for the outcome will bring you peace. Give it a try, outcomes were never in your control anyway, so you might as well not stress over them.